what started off as a fairly simple cleaning has turned into one of those experiences where i am stabbing a broom at the cobwebs in my brain…

finding all sorts of old diaries and mementoes will do that to a girl.
i want to desperately turn over a new leaf, but it’s taking a bit of a psychological effort as well as physical.

by this time next week, i hope to have my apartment not only painted, but walls scrubbed, closets emptied, clothes donated, pictures hung, and looking like a “grown-up home” again, not just a university crash-pad.
i’m sorry i have not been around. i feel badly that i have neglected your blogs and lives so much. my life is poking its insistent head into things, telling me that i signed up for extra work shifts and have a dog and a best friend who just turned 30, and that it is summer and i should PLAY OUTSIDE.

as for the date – well, he was a bit intense. as i mentioned, he is a professional violist so i talked my friend into attending a 2 hour recital OF HANDEL at a CHURCH where he was performing. afterwards we went to a hookah bar where he tried to stare into my eyes and tell me that he knew i was going to be his soulmate from the first time i messaged him ON FACEBOOK, and it went on from there. by the end of it, i just wanted to flee for the hills. it was good, though. we’ve talked a bit since and i have no doubt he’s a wonderful guy, but he’s facing the demons of his various addictions right now and i’m not up to being the new one. besides, it just proved to me that i want to and enjoy being on my own and won’t just take ANYONE anymore.

i’ll be back soon.